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03 junho 2009

Uma Disputa Mentirosa em Trapiá...


... ou "A INACREDITÁVEL DISPUTA ENTRE O INVENCÍVEL METIDO A BESTA LOLÔ E O VERBORRÁGICO TAMPA DE CRUSH CAPETA PARA SABER QUEM É O CABRA MAIS MINTIROSO DO MUNDO... E QUE DEIXOU DEUS PUTO DA VIDA!"


Num lugarejo longínquo
Chamado Trapiá
No véi Rio Grande do Norte
Onde Lampião cansou de aprontá

Aconteceu uma disputa
De dois cabra valente
Eles só usaram a cuca
Disputa bonita, inteligente

Acontece que Lolô
Um ilustre de Trapiá
Deixou o capeta furioso
E sobre isso vou lhes contá

Capeta ficou sabendo
Que de Assú a Mossoró
Num tinha ninguém como Lolô
Mintiroso que só

Lolô ainda disse
Pro espanto da nação
Que tava pra ver cabra mais mintiroso
Que ele em todo sertão

Então alguém lhe disse:
“- Lolô tua coragem me admira
Mas sinto dizer que chegaste tarde
Porque é o capeta o pai da mentira”

O baitinga do Lolô num tomou conhecimento
Do poder do capeta de mentir aos quatro vento
E deu as cara a desafiá num tom de zombação:
“- Mente mais do que eu da onde chifrudo fí do cão...!?”

O capeta ficou sabendo
E chegou no assovio
Cara a cara com o Lolô
Aceitando o desafio

É disputa de esperteza
Pois mentir né fácil não
Tem que falar com certeza
Gerar admiração

Pois mentira bem contada
Faz o cabra até babar
Pois apesar de absurso
Você acha bonito e quer até acreditar

Mininu a coisa foi feia
Que como diria minha avó
É história de fazer tremer nas beira
E arrupiá os cabelos do fiofó

Capeta abriu a boca
Com um bafo de catinga
Falando pra Lolô:
“- O que tu fala num vinga!”

“- Lolô tu é gaiato
Metido a sabido
Tem resposta pra tudo
Atazana meu ouvido”

“- Pensa logo que tu
Zé doidim de trapiá
Se acha tão esperto
A ponto de me peitar?”

“- Tira a catinga do mijo
Dentuço atrevido
Tu num era nem nascido
E eu já mentia nos ouvido”

“- Desde Adão e Eva
Minha mentira tem efeito
Influencio rico e pobre
E até discurso de prefeito”

“- Tu pensa que é assim galego?
Tu é esperto mais nem tanto
Te desafio agora mesmo
E ai? Continua? Ou vai mijar de espanto?”

Lolô num se intimida
Fica rindo todo farceiro
Ele disse: “- Fale baixo!
Ta pensando que sou seu pariceiro?”

“- Tampa de crush tome atendo
Nas coisa que vou falá
Minha boca é como coice de jumento
Meto a resposta no mei dos teus peito que até te falta ar!”

“- Então deixe de conversa
Capeta fi duma cabra
E comece logo e sem arrudeio
A contar tua mentira deslavada”

O capeta se aprontou
E num tom de excelência
Recitou sua mentira
Todo nobre e com eloqüência

“- Lolô vou te contar
Com muita emoção
A história da jumenta
Do profeta Balaão”

“- A jumenta no caminho
Deu de besta a falar
Balaão ficou espantado
quase a se cagar”

“- Mal sabia o profeta
E nem podia desconfiar
Que na verdade eu que ensinei a jumenta
Os fundamentos do bê-a-bá

Lolô ouvindo a história
Não pôde se aguentar
O hômi desatou a rir
E pro capeta foi retrucá

“- Tampa de crush que besteira
Tu é muito é abestado
Tu só ensinou o bê-a-bá
Só mais eu que tô orientando ela no mestrado!”

Diante disso Deus
Chocado com tanta mentira
Desceu logo lá do céu
Com os anjos em comitiva

Capeta e Lolô
Nem acreditaram
Tavam diante de Deus
E nem um dos dois falaram

Deus falou: “- Comé que pode
Seus bando de papangú
Vou dizer umas verdades bem boas
Pra tú e pra tú”

“- Comé que ocês
Tão empolgados em mentir
Enquanto no mundo à coisas tão lindas
E tudo de verdade, sem nada omitir”

“- Se ocês tivessem um pingo
Da mais simples contemplação
Iam ver que não há mentira no mundo
Mais bonita que a verdade verdadeira da criação”

“- Olhem só a mata verde
E os passarinhos à cantar
E o forrózim maravilhoso
Do povo de Trapiá”

“- Diante de tanta beleza
Só há uma coisa procês fazer
É botar joelhinho no chão
E com o coração agradecer”

“- Se quiserem Me encontrar
Perceber Minha grandeza
Abram o coração! Olhem Trapiá!
E Me adorem contemplando a natureza”

Lolô e o capeta
Quase chorando de tanta emoção
Se calaram com profundeza
Em completa adoração!

FIM

George Facundo

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